Oh look! You made it to 2019!

Well hello my beloveds!

After my previous post I’d like to insist that therapy works. I am not a ray of sunshine, but we are pushing through. What sticks with me and something A Course in Miracles insists upon, is that you ought to accept that your thoughts are a singular narrative. There is more than one way of looking at things. The answers won’t walk in with trumpets and your celebrity crush in tow with a placard, but it’ll come- eventually. They always come in a delightful manner, and it is in seeing things differently that you know a miracle has occurred.

One Shahisa Mutali asked in November for tips and tricks surviving hard days on a comment on this post. I can mostly talk about what not to do. And that is drink. Apart from the hangover, aching esophagus and guilt from the abuse to your body, alcohol is not your friend when depressed. That’s one. Another thing is not to remain in your head for too long. I work from home and the silence is not entirely helpful. I’m learning to watch movies, YouTube until the dark cloud passes, treat myself- basically do anything not to think when I’m down. Because the voices in my mind get dark VERY fast.

What has also helped is having a spiritual practice. It helps me to know even when it’s hard, I’m not by myself in the struggle. Belief in God doesn’t automatically mean that the depression will lift and you’ll be bright eyed like nothing happen. Nope. Things will still be trash, but the awareness of a Higher Power gives you hope that’s crucial to survival. Quite literally. 😅

Of quiet days and nature

No seriously…
Which brings me to, “what do normal people think about?” I was explaining to a friend that mental health is the mind working against itself. It’s hard because there is no tangible evidence as to where it hurts. It’s just your emotions are in turmoil, you can’t shut your thoughts up and you still have to shower. Like why? 😂

What do normal people think about anyway? Comment below, it’ll be super helpful tihihihihi!

Moving forward

I realize that exercise is something I have to take up to fight off what’s left of the cloud. Or at least shirk it down to a manageable size. I’m considering signing up for a gym membership because jogging… And I need someone up my butt torturing me with weights and other things to remain committed. Yep. I am officially those January-new-beginning we-gotta-get-that-body people.

Other aspect I wanna take up are- I was gonna say meditation and mindfulness. Yea. Not there yet. Taking myself for lunches and movies sounds more solid. 😂

Your journey is probably different, but remember to do things that a loving friend would do for you, but for yourself. Nothing kicks self-loathing harder than doing nice loving things for yourself. If you’re in the pits, start small. Get a shower gel you’ve always liked. Buy that snack you crave and reminds you of childhood.

Fill your well. People around you can try and help, but only you’ll get it right. There’s more in you than you think. You just need to remember to be willing to look at things differently. Be kind to yourself, you’re still breathing- and that’s a pretty huge deal beloved.

Smile. You made it to 2019.

Happy New Year to you, warrior.

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